roses are red, violets are blue, penis

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

A man gets a new job working for his boss. The boss gives him more and more work and less pay. The man finely gets fed up, beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later speculated that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

Knock knock whos there? Jake jake who? jake from state farm, and i'd like to tell you about our insurance company

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q2: Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2: It was nailed to the first one. Q3: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3: Peer pressure.

Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...