A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

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Three guys walk into a bar. First guy goes up to the bartender and orders a beer. Second guy goes up and orders 2 beers. Third guy sits down and saves seats for the other two guys.

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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42

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Your gay

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Knock Knock Come in Come in who? Come in...wait what?

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What do two black guys do when they walk into the convienent store with masks? Buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

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guess what? bannanas

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops