what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am a homosexual.

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WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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Perverted man: Nice bum where u from Hot ladie with the nice bum: Boston Mass so kiss my ASS

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

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why couldnt justin beiber get into the club? because hes not legal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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