What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

Ol-ive

have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

Why did the little girl cross the road??? To get away from the strange man

Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

Why did the little boy cry? Because his parents were shot in the face while he was forced to watch you insensitive jerk Now walk away ????

Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

How do you greet your great great grandmother born in 1738? Hey, what's up, hello.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

Why was the man with one leg good at balancing on one foot? He used crutches.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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