What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken rape your...wait, that's not how it goes!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

your sister has 1 boob thats funny

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's old and wrinkly? old people

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There was a joke, one sentance, and no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops