How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

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What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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how many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 283,000,322,249,390

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My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

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I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks: "How's the family?" The Horse says: "they are fine." Everyone runs out screaming because Horses can't talk, except the bartender. He has a mental illness.

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Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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Does anyone know any good ways to piss off an Grammar Nazi?

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how did hitler lure the jews onto trains to concentration camps? he told them he hid a penny in one of the cars

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

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So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops