Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar and have a friendly argument over their religious beliefs.

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What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

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An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

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Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

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your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

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Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

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why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

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Why did silly Miss Sally put her baby in the dishwasher? Because she was suffering from advanced stages of Schizophrenia. She thought that her baby was a dish. Her mother, Carol watched in horror as her granddaughter was placed inside. A tear dribbled from her eye. Things had been bad, but because Sally was her daughter, she had been tolerant. Carol sobbed as the baby screamed in terror, unable to escape. Finally, Carol, tears in her eyes, called Child Protective Services on her own daughter, something she didn't want to do. When CPS representatives finally came, they were horrified at the sight of a screaming baby covered in suds with burnt skin that had been scorched by hot jets. Sally's baby, Alex was taken from her and put into foster care.

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A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

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roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

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why did the 11 year old boy stick his hand in a lawnmower nobody knows he hasnt come out of the coma yet

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks: "How's the family?" The Horse says: "they are fine." Everyone runs out screaming because Horses can't talk, except the bartender. He has a mental illness.

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If you took all the veins in your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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Q: Why don't black people like My Chemical Romance? A: Actually, some of them do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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