When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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Bitch

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What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he had ice cream.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

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Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

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what did the church group do at their picnic? drink the kool aid

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What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

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So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

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What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

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what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a doctor.

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women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops