Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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You just read this ..

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So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water jack fell down and broke his neck and he was dead... The End

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Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

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What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

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I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

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Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? You did?! Oh . . .

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How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops