If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

Your mama so fat she is physically larger than other people.

You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

K.

Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

Whats the difference between a Duck? One of its legs are both the same.

so there was two ducks in a bathtub. one duck says to the other duck, "hey, can you pass me the soap? the other duck says no.

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

69

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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