Why was the presidential candidate sad? He mother was raped on her way to hear his speech and his brother hung himself in his apartment two days earlier.

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whats the difference between black people and dogs? people actually care when something happens to a dog

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please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

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Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

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Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

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How do you know a French guy has been in your back yard? Your thrash cans are empty and your dog's pregnant

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No.

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Why did Suzue fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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What is dark, funny looking, black, and rhymes with osama? A black lama.

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A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

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What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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