Dad what does negligence mean? SHUT THE FUCK UP KID! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What a gay guy get on his IQ test? 69

thumb_up thumb_down +7

No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red I have a phone,no texts me am forever alone~The Jokers

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the Black guy, the Asian, and the White guy have in common? they were all brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the kitchen cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops