the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

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Who's there? Knock Knock.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Two Girls One Cup

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Roses are red, my name is Dave. This poem makes no sense, microwave

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Why was the school field trip cancelled? The Holocaust.

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Knock knock Who's there? A pedofile, get in the van Ok

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Why did the vampire die? He had AIDS.

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So, same time tomorrow then?

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If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

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My nieghbor is blonde, but she doesnt like corn dogs or anything of that sort because her boyfriend is mexican. Mexcans are banned from eating corn dogs because they illegally crossed the border. Her dog wieghs about 8.9485763 pounds. Her nieghbor also protests corndogs because she cant fit throught her customized door which was 39 feet long. Why was six afraid of seven? because that lady is 700 pounds.

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"Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?" said the little girl. "I don't know", said the mother," we were robbed of all our money and posessions. And your father was killed while we were gone.

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Roses are red violets are blue come on love show me you boobs/by kw

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

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i dont like attention whores lol

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When Josh moran was born he was thrown up in the air three times and was caught twice.

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What did the normal guy say when he went to the Special Olympics? What a bunch of retards.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

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roses are red violets are blue im colorblind how about you

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The situation... Two black men are skiing down the Sahara. The Question... How much syrup does it take to kill a life-guard. The answer... The sunglasses because he never be a porcupine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got mercifully trampled by a nearby 18 wheeler.

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If a woman was born in China, raised in France and got married and died in New Orleans, what is she? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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