Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

What did the man with cancer do? Die

Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

The WNBA.

A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

how do you get a blonde out of a tree? you politely ask her, then if all else fails call the local fire department

What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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