Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

The Irish man was sober.

what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

Why wouldn't the man in a wheelchair see out the window? The curtains were closed

Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

Knock Knock Who's there its me... we need to talk go away tod. i told you never to come back here babe, just open the door why? so you can beat me again? i said i was sorry! i just want to see my little girl... well maybe you should of been there for us! babe... i love you you lying son of a bitch... you dont deserve us open the damn door or i will beat it down im calling the cops YOU BETTER NOT BITCH! I WILL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU! tod... please... get out come here no... NO! get the hell off of me!!!! HELP!! RAPE!! RAPE!!! SHUT UP WHORE (crying) please... please... ...mommy? SARAH! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! MOMMY LOVES YOU! ooh.. theres my little girl. you miss daddy? GET AWAY FROM HER!!! SHUT UP BITCH! come give daddy a hug what have you done to mommy? what you want some too? SARAH I SAID GET OUT THE HOUSE! GET HELP! ...mommy im scared... (sob) oh your crying? you want something to cry about? OH ILL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT! .... you better get the hell out of here tod.. whoah... babe where did you get a gun GET OUT babe... put the gun down... relax NO YOU RELAX! all these years ive been raising this baby. without you. all by myself. and i dont want you in the picture now. ILL DO WHAT I DAMN WELL PLEASE ill see you in hell... (BANG) (BANG)

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

Q: whats up? A: radiation levels in japan

Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

How much did the Holla Cost?

Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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