What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

What do you call a girl with one leg at your door step? Ilean

my nAME IS ALAN AND IM NOT COOL

Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

What's red and green and goes around and around? A frog in a blender

Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

Q:If a lesbian woman is wearing a jean jacket, high heels, camouflage shorts, and sunglasses, what gender is she ? A: Sheep.

roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

Why was 6 afriad of 7? Because 7 is a rapist.

What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

a ginger has a soul

It's long!

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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