Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Dane Cook makes a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -2

yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

thumb_up thumb_down -4

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

thumb_up thumb_down -10

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops