Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

A Mormon walks into a bar

What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...