I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

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why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

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Billy was so silly that he named his pet zebra Spot.

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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whats black and large -me

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

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What is my name? I dont know

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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Democracy.

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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