Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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Once upon a time, The end.

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

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What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops