What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

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What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

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The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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What do you call an Arab guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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knock knock who's there Steve Go away

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops