pull my finger (farts)

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

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autsim

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

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i like having monkeys lick peanut butter off my nipples

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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A comedian walks onto the stage. Antehumor.

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What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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