A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

What did the Police Officer do after he made a positive identification of a Prostitute? He proceeded to pay her in cash for sexual favors because prostitution is legal in the state of Nevada

the sky is green no it is not

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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