Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

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Roses are red, Bacon is red, Poems are hard, Bacon

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why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Why couldn't the black baby swim? Babies do not posses the muscular capacity nor technique to enable them to properly swim.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I blackmailed his family with rape from Ronald mcdonald

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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Whats bigger than a tree A bigger tree

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A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops