knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

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How do you kill a politician? You set him on fire and stab him in the back 20 times.

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A piece of wood walks into a bonfire. Wood can't walk.

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What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

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What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

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What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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What's white and black and lives in the ghetto : a panda bear

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Knock-Knock Come in! ...

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What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Roses are red, Violets are too. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing infliction.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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