what do u say to a girl after you have sex with her? i like cheese

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why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

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What is better than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to 10 Trees.

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What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

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Whats long and hard and women like to suck on them? A popsicle or long lollipop

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

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Knock Knock Who's There Me

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Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

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There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

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why did the chinken cross the rode? why? to get to the gay persons house. Knock, Knock. Who's there. the chicken.

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There was once a man with a penis so huge, his girlfriend liked their sexual experiences very much. A year later they got married and had kids, however the man got fired from his accounting job and it all went downhill.

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Gary Busey walk into a bar. Everyone Ran out noticing the potential danger.

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How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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