I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

Knock Knock Who's there? Me!! .... me who? Just open the motherf***ing door!! MOM!?! Theres a rapist at the door. MOM: No Jimmy, thats your father

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

whats worse then finding a worn in your apple the holocaust whats worse then the holocaust two worms in your apple

How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

fish fishy caoimhin

Why did the black man cry? He was grieving the death of his brother C.D

What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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