Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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There is no joke here, stop reading.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he does it the same way everybody else does.

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A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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GADZOOKS!

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Z.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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Women's rights.

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What's the capital of Ohio? O

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

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What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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