What's brown and sticky? A stick!

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you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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*Brother comes downstairs wet and naked* Mom: Did you enjoy your shower?

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What do Jim Carrey, Kim Jing-un and Justin Bieber have in common? A penis.

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How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

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How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

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How do you save a black person from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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Why can no one in africa read or write? I would asume the lack of public education combined with the fact that setting up an education system for so many widespread remote comunities would be a logistical nightmare. But then again I have never been to africa and know little about the country and so the premise of this joke is probably a dramatic overstatement in the first place.

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Womens rights

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just imagine like a whole mark no imagine like 1000 marks an army of marks ready to conquer

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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What do you call an indian driving a plane? A pilot.

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Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

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Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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I was thinking... Love conquers all right? Remember the epic crying video? Satan: Because... Some where deep inside... I still love you... God:BUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAUuuuaaaahhh... (Partially invisible effect hand of Satan pats God on the back) The universe is at peace with no opposing forces and I am Nerometal, not that asshole that claims to have one fist and is the leader of some sect, I am and will always be the original Moralman, my name simply happens to be Nero, and thats it, so I am not dissing the bible, why would I none of my business literally, but if love can be tha powerful eh?

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Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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