Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

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Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

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Women have the right to vote.

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once? Seven. Seven girlfriends.

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what's purple and tastes like a grape? a grape.

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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