If a chicken and a half layed an egg and a half in a day and a half how many pancakes does it take to shingle a roof? -A banana has no bones

Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

Why did the kid cry? He had a frog stapled to his face.

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

Why is a man like a packet of cards? Both are organic.

Yo mamas so fat she weighs more than other people

What did the black kid get for his birthday?

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

Brad Fuller!

What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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