Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple ? Finding out your apple is rotten on top of that.

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doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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Why did the frog cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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What's worse than seeing Levi naked? Cancer.

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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Your mom is so fat she's overweight

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven liked to eat numbers lower than itself.

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a man walks into a bar. he orders a single drink, enjoys it, and drives home feeling a bit tipsy, but he was still able to operate his vehicle without an accident or a criminal charge.

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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Black guys shoot. White guys have small penises. Black guys steal. White guys have keep money. Black guys are broke. That's what she said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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