Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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How do you cripple a fireman? You push him down the stairs.

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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If John has no nose, what do John's friends call him? John

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Canadians

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

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s e m e n

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

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Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

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A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

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sorry son your nanas been put down

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A: My dog has no nose. B: How does it smell? A: Terrible.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

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I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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