what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

Yo mama so fat, her whole family is encouraging her to exercise and go on a diet.

Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

What do you call a black guy with a job? Responsible.

Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

What do you call a homosexuall man? Homosexuall man.

why did the blond walk in to a door because she was not paying attention

Your Mom The End.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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