What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You all have Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? A Ferrari was never alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a blond makes out with ron every sunday and she stops every time to remember that she put the cheese in the wrong compartment brick house cheese is sad!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops