Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

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Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

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What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocaust Whats worse that two Holocaust? Dane Cooks Comedian act

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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Whats worse then hell? The guy who commited suicide would know.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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