If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

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a duck walks in to a gay bar and asks for a stick they asked where he wanted it before he could answer he was rapped

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse responds "I have cancer"

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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