You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

Republicans

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

69

Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they're all dead.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

Bitch

Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

What? Why?

What's brown and Rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

What is red and green and goes round and round? A frog in a blender!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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