what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

Why did the girl have twins she was raped

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

to get to the other side.

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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