Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

When life throws you lemons, duck.

9/11

So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

why are marcos hands all swetty. he just got done giving a hand job to joe.

A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

Poop!!

What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

whats black and white with red all over. something that's black and white with red all over.

I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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