A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

A blonde, ginger, and brunette took the SAT. They all performed successfully and were admitted into their colleges of choice.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

Todd is offered a pizza, chinese food, and a sandwich. he then kills himself because options trigger a psychological disorder that was diagnosed to him as a child

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

What did the Mexican overdose on to die. Nothing, he died of old age

What do you call a dog that can't pass an Algebra test? A dog.

An African american man fell out of a boat at sea. He swam back to the boat.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What did the Jew say right before a boy threw a quarter in a fountain? Make a wish.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave Smith.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

Smeg...

You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

What's brown and sticky? Anal

Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

Why can't antelopes fly? Because they can't

my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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