Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They don't speak to each other because muffins do not have the ability to make speech. After being in the oven for several minutes at 375 degrees, they are removed, left to cool, and were eaten. They were good.

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What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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what do you call a black man in the dark? missing.

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your mother is so fat that her doctor advised her to stick to a strict diet and exercise routine to help her lose weight

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

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Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

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if my evil next door neighbor is building a rocket to steal the moon with the help of 3 little girls, a grumpy old man and about 5000 small yellow poeple; what do i do? get sued for coping a copyrighted movie plot

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Knock knock -Who's there? Orange -I don't get it.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

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Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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