Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

What kind of condoms do cows use? None.

Yo mama is so fat because she doesn't exercise and eats way too much calories. The reason fat people gain weight is because of low metabolism which means her body is not burning a lot of fat and instead is storing fat. A healthy life style such as playing sports, walking in a park, or eating healthy foods will benefit her from any medical complications in the future.

this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

Why did 'Mister Love' get arrested? Clue: One of the most ironic things ever You can guess

what do fish smoke? sea weed

Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

Why doesn't Stephen Hawking play football? Because he's a nerd.

What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

How do you confuse a blonde? Hit her over the head with a baseball bat until she has concussion

A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot

Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

if you have hair on the palm of your hand you might want to get that checked out

KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

What do you call two gay black men in one sleeping bag? There names

Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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