whats black and red all over? a chalk board

yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

Whats bad about a black cop coming to your house? I was having a KKK meeting in the basement.

Jake. Walsh.

It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

Why was the boy kissing up to his parents? He only wanted them to say "I love you" for once.

My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had a small penis

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

How do I get to Carnegie Hall? The address is 881 Seventh Avenue at 57th street in New York. it's beside the Russian Tea Room and almost directly across from the IESE school of business. The Russian Tea Room has a large bright red awning out front and a large carving of three dancing bears on the face of the building, the bears are covered in gold leaf. You can't miss it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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