What's green and smells like yellow paint? Green paint.

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What do you get if you cross a football with Theo Walcott? A goal kick.

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Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

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Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

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How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

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Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

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What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

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Stephen Hawkins walks into a bar...

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

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I have a meeting with a man about a horse. I have a chance to win the triple crown. Barboro is gonna do awesome. Oh wait he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops