What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why couldn't the boy turn around in the hallway? Becasue he had a javelin through his head

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

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there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

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what porn does a nugget watch nugget porn.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? About 1 or 2, then the neighbors would phone the police and you would be arrested for infanticide.

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A girl falls out of a tree. She got hit by a flying pig.

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What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

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dude ur such a bon of a sitch

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What do you call a dead cow? Dead Meat.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black.

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What is similar to an orange?? A tangerine.

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Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

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What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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I dyslexic man walks into a bra. This incident had no relation whatsoever to his condition. The bra was just in an unusual and inconvenient location, and he wasn't paying much attention to where he was going.

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What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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How do you get a Blonde to brake her nosebone? You put your dick under a glastable! QQ

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I'm sn otter

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Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops