What did the indian man say to the black man? "Hi."

thumb_up thumb_down +53

A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

thumb_up thumb_down +51

poop nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why is the fat man fat? Because he has an extremly bad metabolism which makes him gain two pounds from eating one cheeseburger

thumb_up thumb_down +41

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why is Dominic's nick name big D? Because the first letter in his name is D.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

don't make holocaust jokes, my grandfather died in the holocaust, he fell out of the birds nest shooting Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops