Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

I'm trying to see from Adam Fantuzzi's point of view but i cant stick my head that far up my arse Daniel

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Mommy mommy I don't want to see grandma. Shut up and keep digging.

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

Knock knock Go fuck yourself

How do you get a n***r out of a tree? Cut the rope

why was the old man on the ground he fell

Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

Guess what? I like trains.

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

Why did billy fall down the stairs? He got pushed.

what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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