Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

Guy #1: Knock knock Guy #2: Whos there? Guy #1: Interrupting murderer Guy #2: Interrupting murd.... Guy #1: STAB!!!

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

A man walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar, and he fractures his skull on it. He died in the hospital a few hours later

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

An Asian man fails a math test

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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