Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

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Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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24

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

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How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

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where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

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It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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