How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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What did the toilet say when I pooped in it Nothing I just crapped in it

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

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Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

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why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

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What's worse than accidentally biting your tongue? Hitler accidentally biting your tongue.

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Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

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a girl and a guy rented a hotel room for a night. theyre siblings and stayed up all night watching very classy movies about farm animals and each of them ordered a chocolate cake to eat while watching their fantastic informational film.

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Look, gullible is written in the sky! The man looks up and there it is.

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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Q: knock knock who is there A;dunno go check

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

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ORGANISM. Yeah, I thought it said "orgasm" too.

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Why can't you tell jokes in Base 8? Because 7, 10, 11

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"your momma's so fat that she died in her sleep last night," said the doctor. "There was nothing we could do."

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house KNOCK KNOCK who's there? da chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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